Meant to Be Miniseries: How I Feel
by kijani
Summary: Third in the Meant to Be Miniseries! Details inside! Reviews appreciated!


**A/N:** This is the third one-shot out of four in the 'Meant to Be' miniseries. The second miniseries, which focuses on Miroku and Sango, will be announced later.

**Summary: **Song by Natasha Bedingfield, "Wild Horses": Kagome wrestles with the inner struggle of battling her own emotions. Will she finally be able to tell Inuyasha how she feels about him? What will it cost her?

Enjoy!

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**Meant to Be Miniseries**  
"**How I Feel"**

"I'm sorry, Hojo. No movie on Saturday. I have to go out of town…" It wasn't _completely_ a lie, was it? "Maybe some other time?" But that was. She didn't really ever want to go anywhere with Hojo. She considered him a friend…and that's where it stopped in her mind.

"Sure!" he nodded. "We can always try again next weekend!"

"Right," she pretended to agree, "…next weekend…" She breathed a sigh of relief as he rode away. Smacking herself in the forehead, she groaned. "Give me a break, Kagome! Get over yourself! You don't even know how _he_ feels, so why not give poor Hojo a chance?"

_Because you love Inuyasha. Because you've always loved Inuyasha. Because, maybe, you don't want to give anyone else a chance until he has had his? _Her inner voice argued with her.

"Shut up," she said to herself. "He doesn't even _want_ a chance with me anyways. Why do I even bother?" But she didn't need her subconscious to answer that one for her. She knew why. "Okay…" she whispered, "so what if I think I'm in love with Inuyasha? I can't do anything about it."

_Yes you can. You could tell him how you feel…_

These constant arguments with herself were going to have to stop at some point. She couldn't handle doubting herself like this. However, the only time her subconscious, argumentative, second voice came into play was in matters dealing with Inuyasha. Unlike with school, and her friends…Kagome couldn't seem to make up her mind about what to do about him.

**I feel these four walls closing in  
Face up against the glass  
I'm looking out, hmmm**

It was a constant battle with herself…with her own emotions. She didn't know what to say to him, or how to say it…and even if she could, she wasn't sure she liked the idea of being rejected by the one person who she loved more than anything.

Swinging her overstuffed yellow bag over her shoulder, Kagome took a deep breath and headed out towards the well house that would take her back to the feudal era…back to him.

She relaxed as the purple light from the magical bone-eater's well enveloped her, and she fell slowly through time. Finally, as she was nearing the end, the light dimmed, and she felt her feet touch the soft ground on the well bottom.

Groaning, she tossed her yellow bag over the lip of the well, but stopped short before she herself began to climb. Something out there was not right. Inuyasha was always there when she got back. He had always been there to help her out of the well…but she had received no help. Outside, above her, everything was quiet. It was far too quiet for Inuyasha's forest at the start of fall. She at least expected _some_ noise…but she could hear nothing.

Her defenses went up automatically when she realized what this dead silence…this foreboding feeling she had must have meant. Naraku. If she climbed out now, he would get her for sure, but if she went back, she was leaving her friends, and Inuyasha, to deal with Naraku on their own.

She shivered at the thought of what she was about to do. Everything in her told her not to climb to the top of that well, but she was doing it anyway. She had to do it.

"Inuyasha?" she called out, gasping for breath as she reached the top. She looked around. She had been right. There was nothing. Not even insects dared come into the area. It was…creepy. "Inuyasha? Sango? Miroku? Anyone? Where are you guys?" she yelled, fear gripping her heart. Maybe Naraku had already…?

She shook the thoughts from her head, and swallowed hard.

"I'm right here, Kagome…"

She wheeled around. She would recognize that cocky laugh anywhere. Behind her, as though he had materialized out of nowhere, was none other than Naraku himself. "Naraku!" she snapped. "What have you done with everyone?"

"Not with _everyone_, Kagome…just with _him_." Naraku smirked. "I thought that you would like the new and improved Inuyasha. Your friends loved it. Fell to pieces over him…"

All color drained from Kagome's face. "What…What do you mean?" she stammered. "What did you do to him?"

"Why don't you ask him yourself?" Naraku suggested.

Kagome's heart broke at what she saw next. Inuyasha. But it wasn't him. Not as she knew him. His eyes were red, his fangs elongated, his claws sharper than ever…he even had the markings. He was in full demon form. Kagome chanced a glance down to his waist, where the tesseiga still hung safely from its sheath.

"What…did you do?" her voice broke. "Inuyasha…are you…are you all right?"

He only growled, and took a step forward, cracking his knuckles as though she was nothing more than his prey. But still, she could not bring herself to back away from him.

**Is this my life I'm wondering  
It happened so fast  
How do I turn this thing around?**

"I told you, Kagome…this is the _new and improved Inuyasha_…"

"Inuyasha…where are the others? You didn't hurt them, did you? Inuyasha?" Kagome's voice was beginning to sound panicked. "Please tell me you didn't…"

He only growled, taking several more steps toward her. He was only a couple of feet away now. If he'd really wanted to, he could have already ripped her to shreds. Why he hadn't, she wasn't sure.

"Inuyasha, you can fight this!" she yelled at him. "I know you can do it. You've done it before. Don't let him control you. Don't let _it_ control you…" she took another step backwards.

_Please, come back to me, Inuyasha._

"You can no longer reach him, wench. He is gone to you. He only listens to me now."

Kagome shook her head, her hands pulsing in anger. "No! I can always bring him back! Always!" she argued, tears beginning to form under her eyelids. _He's too far gone now…_

"He's not gone. He can't be!" Kagome cried, taking another step back.

Naraku chuckled. "What a magician I've turned out to be. I've managed to turn love into fear…" he mused. "You can't save him if you're afraid of him, can you, Kagome?" he snickered.

Kagome wiped the tears from her eyes, sucking in a sharp breath as she did so. "I'm not…I'm not afraid of Inuyasha…" she whispered. "I'll…bring him back!"

"He doesn't care about you anymore, wench! You're nothing more than an afternoon snack for him!" Naraku teased. One of his tentacles shot out and wrapped around Kagome's body, squeezing her so tight she was sure that her lungs would be crushed. "Who can save you now, priestess?" he hissed.

"Inu…yasha…" Kagome gasped. Naraku squeezed tighter, and she coughed with the effort of her speech. "Ple…help…" she managed. Naraku squeezed tighter, and Kagome began to turn blue. The sharp end of Naraku's tentacle was boring into her side and crushing her at the same time. Soon, she would surely pass out…

Then, suddenly, he dropped her. She landed with a hard thud, sputtering and gasping for much needed air. "See, wench? He cares nothing for you anymore. I think I will let him finish you off. It should be entertaining to watch…"

**Is this the bed I chose to make  
There's greener pastures I'm thinking about  
Hmm, wide open spaces far away**

Kagome struggled, managing to pull herself up onto one knee as he started to approach her, his fangs glistening.

"Inuyasha…don't…" Kagome pleaded. "You don't want to do this. I'm…your friend…" her voice broke.

He wasn't listening to her. He couldn't listen. She was going to die by Inuyasha's hand. Ironically, this is how things had started back when she first found him. Back when Lady Kaede had…

She stopped cold. "Inuyasha…" she frowned. "Sit!"

The rosary around his neck lit up, but unlike before, it did not seem to have any effect on him whatsoever. He stopped a moment to stare at it as it lit up with power…but only a moment.

Kagome closed her eyes tightly, but the blow she was waiting for never came. She opened her eyes. She was kneeling in someone's shadow. The long, silky silver hair behind him gave away his identity almost immediately.

"Sesshoumaru?" Kagome squeaked.

He glanced back at her. "Get out of here. I will handle my brother. You are too badly injured to stay." He ordered her.

After a second of thought, Kagome only shook her head. "Sesshoumaru, I can't go. I won't. I won't let you hurt him…" her voice shook.

Sesshoumaru growled. "He is nothing more than a mindless beast right now, woman. I have no other choice! Now, go!" he commanded.

"No!" Kagome screamed, tears rolling down her cheeks again. "I can help him…I've always been the one to help him!"

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened in surprise. He was amazed that this girl was even conscious, but now, she was standing up. "Woman, you are going to get yourself killed!" he snapped at her.

"I have to try…" was the only answer she gave him.

**All I want is the wind in my hair  
To face the fear but not feel scared**

"Inuyasha…?" Kagome said, barely above a whisper.

Naraku scowled. The arrival of Sesshoumaru meant a _real_ opponent. Now that the girl wasn't technically alone anymore, he would have to watch his back. Sesshoumaru kept a steady eye trained on him at all times.

"I've already told you, you _stupid_…" Naraku began.

Kagome cut him off. "Shut up! You don't tell me when it's over!" She screamed at him.

Inuyasha growled, and Kagome quickly turned her attention back to him. "Inuyasha…can you hear me? I'm…not scared of you, Inuyasha. I need you. You have to come back…" she insisted, taking slow steps forward.

Inuyasha flexed his claws as though he would strike at her, but Kagome kept walking forward.

"He'll kill you before you can get too close!" Naraku smirked.

"So be it!" Kagome snarled. "I will not…give up on him! I refuse…" Another tear slid down her cheek.

She was getting so close…until he stepped in her way again. "Kagome…he doesn't recognize you anymore. He nearly killed the monk. You can not handle him like this. He is too far gone. Can't you see that?" Sesshoumaru pointed out.

**Wild horses I wanna be like you  
Throwing caution to the wind, I'll run free too  
Wish I could recklessly love like I'm longing to  
I wanna run with the wild horses  
Run with the wild horses, oh**

_He's too far gone, Kagome._

_He doesn't even recognize you anymore. _

_He doesn't love you; he's going to kill you with his bare hands._

Kagome choked back a sob. "I can't, Sesshoumaru. I can't see it, and I won't see it. You have to let me try, please. It's Inuyasha. I can not just let you kill him. He is…he means…" she could not find the words.

Sesshoumaru allowed his eyebrow to raise slightly. "Kagome…he is _going to kill you_. He isn't who he used to be anymore…yet you still would try to…"

"…to reach him? Yes. I have to. I know he's there somewhere, and we…we…" Again, she was at a loss for words.

"You both are going to die," Sesshoumaru whispered dangerously. "He will kill you, and then I will be forced to kill him…" he explained. "It's pointless."

"No, it's not." She assured him. "I don't care what happens to me, but please…" she begged him. "I do care what happens to _him._"

With that said, a stunned Sesshoumaru took a step sideways. Inuyasha was looking at them both with confusion in his red eyes.

_If anyone can do this, you can. _She told herself. _You have to bring him back. He has to come back, so you can tell him how much…_

Kagome took a deep breath.

**I see the girl I wanna be  
Riding bare-back, care-free  
Along the shore  
If only that someone was me  
Jumping head-first, head-long  
Without a thought**

"Inuyasha…" Kagome whispered, "I know the real you is in there somewhere. I know this isn't you…" she insisted. "Please…please come back to me…"

Naraku's eyes widened in shock. Was the girl actually going to try and approach Inuyasha, even though he was nothing but a blood-thirsty monster? This would prove to be rather interesting…

Sesshoumaru stood, his sword at the ready, one eye on Naraku, and the other glued steadily to the scene unfolding before him. _This woman is crazy…_

Kagome continued to walk slowly towards him, and he continued to flex his claws as though he was readying an attack. Her eyes were full of unshed tears as she approached him.

He took a swing, catching her shoulder with his claws as he did so. She hissed as the searing pain shot through her body. Blood poured from the wound in a steady flow, but she did not stop.

Finally she was standing right in front of him, and he was raising a clawed hand for another attack…

**To act and DAMN the consequence  
How I wish it could be that easy  
But fear surrounds me like a fence  
I wanna break free**

She looked up into his eyes, which were still red with his demon's lust for blood. Then, she did the only thing she could think to do…she wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug, and held on for dear life.

"Inuyasha, come back to me." She said. "I…"

She gasped, her words cut short as Inuyasha's clawed hand sliced at her back. The pain was twice that which went through her shoulder, and she nearly fell over with it…but she refused to let go of him.

"I'm not…going anywhere…Inu…yasha…" she managed to choke out. "Not until you're all right…"

Sesshoumaru scowled as the scent of blood…lots of blood, assaulted his nose. The girl would soon bleed to death of her wounds…wounds she had received from Inuyasha. Yet she still clung to him as though he was her only lifeline to this world. Sesshoumaru wasn't sure, but it could be that he was, at this point…

**All I want is the wind in my hair  
To face my fear, but not feel scared**

"I'm not letting go, you…idiot…" Kagome swayed slightly, fighting to keep her eyes open, to stay conscious just a little while longer.

Inuyasha growled, looking down at her. He raised his hand again, but Kagome reached up and grabbed his wrist, yelping in pain as she did so.

"Don't hurt me, Inuyasha," she pleaded in a voice barely audible, even to his sensitive ears, "don't hurt me anymore. Just come back. Please. I need you to come back. I have to tell you how much I…"

He growled, jumping away from her and pushing her into the dirt.

**Oooh, wild horses I wanna be like you  
Throwing caution to the wind, I'll run free too  
Wish I could recklessly love like I'm longing to  
I wanna run with the wild horses  
Run with the wild horses, oh**

Kagome gasped in pain as the dirt stung her open wounds.

Naraku threw his head back in laughter. "You're going to bleed to death for him, and he doesn't even remember who you are!" He smirked. "You really are stupid, aren't you?"

"No…" Kagome shook her head, refusing to let her tears fall. "I will _make _him see!" she said in a determined voice. "I will make him come back to me…"

"By getting yourself killed?" Sesshoumaru called. "Kagome, you _will_ die!"

**I wanna run too  
Oooh oh oh oh  
Recklessly abandoning myself before you  
I wanna open up my heart  
Tell him how I feel, ooh ooh**

She was right in front of him again. This would be her last try…the last try she would be able to make, anyway. She could feel her consciousness starting to slip away more and more with every pained move that she made. Once again, she smiled, wrapping her arms around him, and snuggled into his chest.

"Inuyasha…I told you…I'm not going anywhere…" She groaned in quick, labored breaths. "Can't you see? I need you. You can't be gone, because…I never got to tell you…" her breath caught in her throat, "how much I…how much I love…love you…" she finished, her eyes rolling into the back of her head and her legs finally failing her.

She would have collapsed into a heap on the ground, but she was still holding tight to Inuyasha, and he, oddly enough, was holding on to her.

After a moment, in which he stood in near complete silence, he wrapped his arms around her, careful of the wound he had given her across her back, and dropped to the ground.

"I…I love you, too…" he whimpered.

**Oooh, wild horses I wanna be like you  
Throwing caution to the wind, I'll run free too  
Wish I could recklessly love like I'm longing to  
I wanna run with the wild horses  
Run with the wild horses  
Run with the wild horses**

Sesshoumaru jumped in surprise, and Naraku, an angry scowl plastered on his face, disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

Sesshoumaru cleared his throat. "Inuyasha? Can you hear me?"

He was staring at Kagome, cradling her head in his arms, holding her so carefully one may have thought she was made of glass. He looked up, meeting his half brother's eyes. The facial markings of a full demon were still there, but his eyes had returned to their natural golden hue.

"Inuyasha?" Sesshoumaru repeated.

Inuyasha could only stare down at Kagome, his eyes glazed over in sadness. He swallowed. "She loved me," he whispered, his voice broken, "and I killed her. What am I supposed to do?"

Sesshoumaru shook his head. "I think, little brother, that the question is: what am I _going_ to do?" he corrected him.

Inuyasha did not hide his confusion. "What do you mean?"

"I mean," Sesshoumaru clarified, "that I have never seen someone, _ever_ care for _anyone_ that much before. And I can't explain why, but for some reason, I just can not let things end like this…" He glanced momentarily down at his tenseiga, which was already pulsing slightly, and flashed a small smile at his brother.

"Thank you, Sesshoumaru…" Inuyasha breathed, the fatigue and worry obvious in his voice.

Sesshoumaru nodded, a small glint in his eyes. "You're welcome," he said curtly. "But…no one ever needs to know this happened? Got it. I can't have people thinking that I've gone and went soft…"

Inuyasha did not need to reply. There was a new sort of understanding between them. And all of it, they acknowledged, was thanks to the actions of no one but Kagome…

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**A/N: **I know…the ending. But hey, this was a long one, and I do need to sleep on occasion. Anyway, the fourth and final installment in this little miniseries will be out very soon…so look for it! Hope you enjoyed this one! As always, reviews are loved!


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